After you’ve been hurt by a romantic partner, how do you go back to trusting again? I know that I, for one, found it difficult to trust a man again when I started dating years after an abusive relationship. I had taken years away from relationships on purpose (for many reasons). Trusting someone else with my heart was not something that would come easy for me. To be honest, I still have days that I struggle.
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What Makes Trusting Someone Difficult
I look back on my 20’s and think wow I didn’t even question if the guy I was dating was faithful to me or not. Nope. I just assumed he was. That he respected me. And that he respected us as a pair like I did. This was true regardless of how we came to know one another, whether through a friend, work, or an online dating platform like Devon dating.
Then came a difficult, unhealthy relationship in which I was cheated on. While there are more hurts involved than that one alone in that relationship, the affair was certainly one piece that rattled me and made me question how to ever trust another man in a romantic way again.
I remember thinking I would never date again. I watched friends form happy connections around me, including on dating sites. Today there are popular ones like Wiltshire dating and North Yorkshire dating site. Others met in the workplace, at dance clubs, and were set up on dates by loved ones.
But I was sure that I wouldn’t fall in love again. So I avoided any of those opportunities. Sometimes something shakes you so bad that you lose the ability to trust without putting up a wall first that the other person has to power through to reach your heart. At least that’s what happened to me.
Finding Trust When Dating Again: How to Do It
There’s obviously not just one way to get back to trusting someone. For me, it still takes a lot of time. Eventually I learned that I am allowed to be happy. And that I must be hopeful about finding love. Only once I accepted these things was I able to find love. I believe that we must accept these things as single women in Plymouth, Victoria, Vancouver, Tokyo, London, Mexico City, and anywhere else.
My boyfriend is very patient, and he says things like “I know it will take time for me to earn your trust because of what you’ve been through.” This means a lot to me as it’s not him specifically that I’m having difficulty building trust with but instead whoever would be my partner. I know it is a lot for him to be patient about and I’m doing my best also to learn to trust fully again.
But why am I going to all of this trouble? Because he’s worth it. Because I deserve to be in a healthy, trustworthy relationship. Gloucester dating or dating anywhere else in the world isn’t easy to do after your confidence has been shaken at its core from a previous partner (or multiple exes). But getting back out there and dating is how to open yourself up to an opportunity for love. I now believe in not only being loved for who I truly am but also wholeheartedly caring for someone else for that same reason. This is what each of us deserves.
What advice would you give someone for building trust in a relationship?