It’s Your Birth, You Can Scream If You Want To

Pregnancy and what's right for your birth
You're growing a child within you and other people may think they have the right to decide what's right for him or her. Flickr, CC BY-SA 2.0.

Women have been told what to do with their bodies for a long time. Once, we were but vessels for a man’s child (preferably a boy because, well, you know…). Of course, things have come a long way since then. Women got the vote, and with it, a voice with which to be heard. But, when it comes to pregnancy, the chances are that a lot of people will still try to tell you what to do.

Something strange happens when you’re growing a child. People think they have a right to you, so long as they have that child’s best interests at heart. And, yes, the child is the priority. But let’s not forget that your needs should come into play as well. Your birth, therefore, should be down to no one but you. Instead of listening to the opinions you’ll hear, stick to what you know is best. To help, here are a few ways to ensure your birth is right for you.

Popular Isn’t Always Best

A lot of mothers never understand the choices available to them. Everyone else goes into hospital, so they do the same. Most people choose a bed birth, so they disregard water or interactive options. But, it’s important to bear in mind that what’s popular may not be best for you.

You may not want your child born in a sterile, disinfected hospital. Is that the first place you want them to see? Yet, the suggestion of giving birth away from medical professionals is enough to make many mothers quake. Why? Because it’s not the norm! In truth, there’s no reason a home birth can’t run smooth. There are, of course, risks. But, there’s no reason this can’t work if you develop a proper plan with a medical professional. An obstetrician who specializes in pregnancy planning, will be able to put your mind at ease about any doubts. Together, you can also ensure you have an emergency plan in place should you need one.

To Scream Or Not To Scream?

It’s also worth considering whether you want a silent birth or not. Again, this is a decision only you can make, and there are pros and cons to both sides of the argument. Silent birth mothers claim that they don’t want their child entering the world to cries. And, that does make some sense. But, that doesn’t mean your child will be traumatized if you do choose to make noise throughout. Birth is so traumatic for the baby that they forget everything, anyway. So, if you feel making noise would help you, don’t hesitate to do so.

Accept That Plans Change

No matter what pregnancy plans you make, it’s also important to accept that plans change. A successful birth is about taking care of you and baby, no matter what. If you don’t feel comfortable at home, make arrangements to go to a hospital. If you planned to be silent but feel the need to scream, just do it!


  1. ALL good points, Christy. I have long said that a pregnant woman is NOT to be relegated to the role of “host organism” — her life matters too (and she has tenure!).

    Just linked to “Advice and Boundaries.”
    (Madelyn Griffith-Haynie – ADDandSoMuchMORE dot com)
    ADD/EFD Coach Training Field founder; ADD Coaching co-founder
    “It takes a village to transform a world!”

  2. Great post, thanks so much ❤️ I had both of by babys without any pain medications. The first one in bed and the second doing yoga and in water. After my experience birth should not be done laying down in bed. My second birth was so much better for both 🌸❤️

  3. Awesome article! I had both of my girls without any pain medications, but at the end you could have given me anything and I would have taken it! hahahaha! Well, our good old german midwives are not that fond of early complains, and rather send you up and down the hospital staircase in order to get your labor going! But I absolutely agree. Happiest days of my life! :)

  4. Great post, Christy! Birth is a traumatic event for both mother and child. LOL! I remember both my boys births like they happened yesterday and they were so different, just like they are. :)

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