No matter what age you are when you become a mom, your life will change. You could be barely an adult or about to enter middle age; whichever one applies, you’re still going to go through a lot of the same experiences. Regardless of your background or other personal details, you will notice that you completely change. And feelings of losing identity in motherhood can arise.
You no longer put yourself first because now you have this incredible little life (or more of them) to care for. At first, it can be overwhelming. But, before long, it just becomes natural. You’re a mom, and you’re enjoying most of the journey (everyone has their moments). But you may find that you don’t always feel like yourself anymore – and that doesn’t have to be the case.
Because YES you can be a mom and still be you. Here are some tips to help strengthen your sense of self now that you’re a mother.
Get into a rhythm
First of all, to make this happen, you really have to get yourself into a good rhythm. This is easier said than done but if you can find a schedule or routine that works for your family then you’re going to be able to nail this mom thing and have more time to feel like you again. When things start to work a little more like clockwork, you are in a better position to avoid stressful moments and feel like you’ve got this.
Have a hobby
If you manage to free up a little more time, or just make better use of the time you have, you’ll be able to indulge in a little something for you. So, find a hobby. Whether it’s something that you choose to do one evening per week or while the kids are at school – do it. You will be able to have that one hour here or there to dedicate to yourself, to then come back fully refreshed for more mom duties.
Losing identity in motherhood? Find support
You may also need to get yourself some support because being a mom is tough. Sometimes, you get stressed out, and at other times you’ll find yourself needing some advice. This is where something such as the tips from innerparents comes in, or a close circle of other moms. You need to have that support; they’re there to help you when times feel tough.
Next, you’ll likely find that it’s worth your time to keep on working – even if it’s from home. Lots of people love the idea of being a full-time mommy but it can be exhausting, and you can lose yourself in it. But, by keeping your job or choosing to volunteer, you have something else to focus on, in addition to parenting.
Make room for ‘me time’
Finally, you’re also going to want to make room for some ‘me time’. It’s not being selfish. And it can just be a few minutes – these ideas can help. But you do need to ensure that you can recharge and regroup so that you know you’re still you!