Today I am proud to showcase memoir writer D.G. Kaye, who discusses the use of memoir writing as a vehicle for healing the self. I will give her the floor here as her guest post below such a high-quality one! Take it away, D.G.
I was delighted when you opened up this blog because the issues you present here are all so relatable to other women; a place where we can come and read inspiring stories about women who have accomplished so much in various aspects of life.
I personally enjoy reading stories of people’s personal victories, of overcoming adversity, and growing from unhealthy situations. I am happy to see that in this time of the world, more and more women are recognizing, confronting and speaking out about injustices they have endured.
Guest post from D.G. Kaye on memoir writing
I’m a memoir writer. My first book Conflicted Hearts is a collaboration of years of journaling memories. My struggles stemmed from growing up as an emotionally neglected child with a narcissistic mother, learning to find my place in the world, while striving to deal with the emotional baggage that followed me.
Unfortunately, abuse is a common issue that too many women endure. We don’t have to have been raped or beaten to have suffered abuse. Abuse lives under the guise of many forms. Emotional neglect is a common form of abuse. Sadly, many women have lived with abuse for so long that they may not be able to recognize that they are being abused because it becomes so familiar. Others may recognize it and fear running away from it because of a myriad of reasons such as being financially dependent on the abuser or perhaps even having a fear of what lies ahead for them if they attempt to leave.
Verbal and emotional abuse is a common practice many women suffer and endure at some point in their lives. The residual damages are devastating to our psyches and self-esteem, and have the propensity to stay with us our whole lives. Low self-esteem cripples our ability to function properly. We tend to develop inferiority complexes, anxieties, and feelings of inadequacy down the road. Our inner damage also plays a part in how we choose our relationships and influences us with the choices of people we allow into our lives.
I’m a nonfiction memoir writer. I wrote three books on different topics: Conflicted Hearts – mother guilt and finding my place in life, Meno-What? – overcoming the dragons of menopause, and Words We Carry – how our self-esteem are molded from the things that happen to us when we are young. If you read all three of my books, you would find a common thread. Although my books are all on different subjects, you can detect my insecurities within them which I’ve battled most of my life.
More from D.G. Kaye
In my newest book, Words We Carry, I dissected my own insecurities and delved into my past, seeking what had prompted my own low self-esteem. Childhood teasing and ridicule have a great impact on how we begin to see ourselves, and aid in the choices we make in life such as our appearance and the relationships we tend to gravitate to.
In my books, I talk about all of these issues by exposing my own situations I encountered and sharing the methods I used to triumph over my own shortcomings, hoping to leave positive messages for those readers who struggle with their own identity issues.
Talking to others about our insecurities empowers and inspires us to help ourselves. It helps to know we are not alone with our inner struggles. By learning about positive outcomes from others, it reinforces our beliefs that there is always hope for us to triumph over our self-doubts. It’s all about women helping women.
Realizing our own self-worth can be difficult for many who have been taunted and ridiculed in their younger lives because those words are instilled in us. In order to rise above self-criticizing, we need to weed out the negative forces in our lives and learn to get to know and love our unique selves.
Quotes to live by
Below are some quotes of kindness and inspiration from D.G. Kaye:
“Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.” C.S. Lewis
“There is no education like adversity.” Benjamin Disraeli
“Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle.” Plato
“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?” D.G. Kaye
Connect further with the author
Words We Carry is now available in paperback.
You can find D.G. on: Twitter Facebook Linkedin Goodreads
You can also check out her author page.
Top photo: Meet D.G. Kaye, memoir writer. Photo courtesy of D.G. Kaye
I really identify with this post. I’m currently writing my own memoir in which I expose years suffering in silence
This is odd. I’ve been here and have read this interview, Debby. Seems my comment disappeared. Odd.
Oh :( I went to the Spam folder and no comment there either. Not sure what happened. This one came through though.
Thanks for this one, Debby and Christi. Seems so essential to approach our writing with a desire to help others get through the roadblocks of life. “By learning about positive outcomes from others, it reinforces our beliefs that there is always hope for us to triumph over our self-doubts. It’s all about women helping women.” Yes, yes, yes.
I love how you’ve leveraged your struggles to become such an insightful woman. Thanks for being a great example to look up to! :)
Lovely sentiments – “It helps to know we are not alone with our inner struggles.” And quotes too – I like yours, Debby: “For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?” D.G. Kaye You are painting the picture of a world in perfect balance. Love this!
You have a gift! Great post and great blog!
When you go through a chapter and reach out to others to shine light…then that light lifts all. Way to go D.G. and thank you Christy for sharing. <3
So very powerful – thanks to you Christy and D.G. Kaye! <3
Thank you Charlene. :)
Thanks Linnea! :)
Christy, having D.G. Kaye guesting on your blog is fabulous. What an insightful and thoughtful person D.G. Kaye is. I relate to many things said in this post!
Thanks kindly Resa. :)
Thanks so much Christy for introducing us to D.G. Kaye. I hold memoirs in high-esteem and hers sounds like I would really enjoy reading them.
Another laudable effort from you christy. kaye is obviously a wonderful writer going by her existing portfolio and her stories are bound to have an uplifting impact on troubled souls…best wishes to kaye….raj
D.G. and Christy, great post! D.G., you know you and I came through similar experiences and our beliefs on the power of writing memoir are the same. Christy, good choice for a guest to post on your blog!
Hi Sherrey, lovely to find your comment here. Yes, we do seem to come from similar situations, perhaps that is how the universe connected us? Thank you so much for commenting and reblogging. :)
Thanks so much LaTanya for reblogging this post. :)
Thank you so much Christy for inviting me to your blog. I am all about inspiration and overcoming and what better place to be than here at your page to share my thoughts and hopefully inspire others. I thank everyone here for their kind comments. :)
I am so glad we were able to join together for this guest post and appreciate your beautiful words that are the star of the post!! Thank you again for being here and for your genuine message of hope.
We are both welcome, lol. :) Just a head’s up, I thought I’d give this lovely post a week or so to run well on your page, and I will be reblogging it on my page next week. <3
Aww so nice you will reblog it! HUGS and thanks in advance ♥
<3
D.G. Kaye’s story is truly inspiring. And I like her quote: “For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
Great guest post, Christy. Thank you.
Thank you Irinadim :)
My pleasure. :)
A lot of personal wisdom here. I will buy it.
Thank you kindly Maria. :)
D.G. what a wonderfully inspiring post x
Thanks for reading me here Shehanne :).
Hi D.G. Kaye… an interesting life leads to a wonderful writing of healing and triumph. Verry well written and inspirational for all readers.
Thanks for the intro Christy…
Hugs
Hi Rolly, thanks for your kind words. :)
A great guest post, Christy! …
D.G is right when she says that abuse lives under the guise of many forms and that emotional neglect is a common form of abuse. I like the message she spreads regarding realizing our own self-worth.
She is a great writer and I wish you the best with her memoir books.
Aquileana :)
Thanks for your always uplifting compliments dear Aqui! :)
Wow! To be able to stand up to any type of abuse requires a tremendous amount of inner strength, but to be able to write so eloquently about it and share it with the world is evidence of a powerful soul. Of course, I am going to have to read these books.
Thanks so much Macjam for your applause. I write from my own experiences and share my own personal struggles in the hopes that I can inspire others by taking something from my words. :)
A most excellent post!!!
Thank you Clanmother. :)