One of the hardest things to deal with in life is watching your parents get older. At some point, if they live well into their Golden Years, the natural process of aging happens. That means they’ll begin to lose the ability to care for themselves, and you’ll be faced with the choice of caring for them or putting them into a nursing home. It’s normal to have second thoughts about your elderly parents living in a nursing home. No one wants to feel like they “gave up” on their elderly parents, but it takes a lot of work, special equipment, and medical knowledge to handle the effects of aging.
Dealing with society’s expectations
This problem is compounded in many societies, where the expectation is to take care of your family, no matter how much it affects you and everyone else. Part of the problem is due to the stereotype of nursing homes within a specific societal area. A common perception of these types of places is that they’re where you take your family members when you don’t want to deal with them anymore.
Once there, they’re fed and have their basic needs cared for, but are otherwise ignored. I wish I could say this was a misconception, but it does happen. Occasionally, people need a nursing home injury lawyer to deal with the results of neglect or abuse.
Better care is possible
The good news is that some places have advanced their nursing home care to include holistic, respectful, and enjoyable environments. When you find a place that offers elder care services with medical healthcare equipment, medicine administration, and a loving atmosphere, it’s not as difficult to leave your parents there.
Look for a home that includes extras such as beauty parlors, planned social activities, outings, and other extracurricular amenities. Even if your parents can’t enjoy them because of their declining health, the fact that the home offers them speaks volumes about the way they treat their residents.
Finding a home that offers hobbies, such as gardening or arts and crafts, is important. These little activities are scientifically proven to reduce cognitive decline and social isolation in elderly individuals.
It’s possible to have the best of both worlds
Visit often, especially at first. You’ll feel better, and so will your parents, when everyone knows the home isn’t a place to be “pawned off” and forgotten. You’ll quickly see whether you made the right choice or not as you get to know the nurses and other staff.
If your parents are thriving, or at least in competent hands, you’ll sleep much better knowing they’re being cared for better than you could have done. You won’t worry about elder abuse either.
On the other hand, trust your gut instincts. There are other nursing homes around, especially in bigger cities. You may have to drive a bit to find one you’re satisfied with, but never leave your parents in a place where you wouldn’t be content yourself when you’re older.
It’s possible to care for your parents while still living your own life. As long as you find a care home that is beneficial and includes staff that treats the residents with dignity, you’ll be able to put a stop to those second thoughts plaguing you.
4 thoughts on “Having second thoughts about putting your elderly parents in a nursing home?”
HI Christy, this is a tough decision. It is very difficult when parents become infirm either physically or mentally. People don’t have the skills to care for certain ailments at home.
You’re right about needing a certain skillset, Robbie
Nursing home is an option for people who don’t have the choice especially if no one is available to take because of work. I think it is important, too, to hear what the elderly thinks about putting them in nursing homes. With the many reports of abuse, it’s really hard to entrust an elderly to these institutions.
It’s certainly a complex decision